That's My Walker

Working in a nursing home forces me to have "not so average" moments nearly every day. Each and every resident has their own distinct personality. Some nights fly by without any complications. Others......not so much. It seems like once a month they all, even the quiet ones, become possessed by some god-awful demanding raging elderly demon!

Last night, one of the residents did not come out for supper on time. She was sleeping so soundly that everyone just let her be for fear of being screamed at. When she finally came out, we were already cleaning up the dining room just as she had begun to eat. The girl I work with started clearing off her table without asking her if she was finished. That set her off. She was mad as hell and immediately started chewing her out. "You need to learn to ask! All the other girls ask me! You can't just take my stuff and not ask!" So, the girl politely asks her if she is finished with the rest of her meal. The angry old lady replies yeah she is finished. We continue to clear off the table and the angry old woman gets up to leave.

She turns around and grabs a walker that belongs to the lady behind her. This woman is a die-hard card player and was simply waiting for her group to come along. She turns to the other woman and says, "hey, that's my walker." The angry old lady replies, "yours has yellow balls!" By now the other girl and I have turned to watch what is going on and yes indeed, Captain Grouchy has stolen Crazy Card Lady's walker.

Captain Grouchy begins to walk off with Crazy Card Lady's walker when Crazy Card Lady says, "HEY! THAT'S MY WALKER!" Captain Grouchy stops, turns around, finally grabs her walker, and starts to walk off. Crazy Card Lady begins to apologize saying, "I'm sorry for the confusion, it's hard because I can't hear very well." Captain Grouchy replies, "I can't hear either! You just shut your mouth!" Then she just walks off leaving Crazy Card Lady, the other girl, and I alone in the most hilarious confusion.