How Dad ruined Christmas

So basically my boyfriend and I had been planning on buying my mom a new vacuum for Christmas to satisfy her vacuuming needs to their fullest extent...

The Manflu

The Manflu is one of the world's most over dramatic sicknesses. It can only be caught via man to man and possesses great laziness symptoms. It will obviously be worse than any sickness their wife, girlfriend, daughter, aunt, grandma, friend, or cousin of the female species could contract. (Just because they say so)

        "I'm obviously in more pain than you"

Back To Blogging About My Shitty Life

Let me tell you all about my crappy life right now...


It all started when I bought a dog. He is an Italian Greyhound and his name was Baccie. (I changed it to Riley because what the fuck is a Bacci?) Anyways, I brought him home Friday night and snuggled up close to me and slept in the bed. The next morning I woke up and took him out to the living room with me. Being a cute puppy, he was begging for me to pick him up and put him onto the couch...so I did. 


Then what happens? He got excited and started tugging on my bathrobe. I played back and he started getting super hyper and excited. He took a wrong step on a loose cushion, lost his balance, fell off the couch. and broke his leg!!! I heard it snap and him yelp and my heart sunk. I broke down into tears.


I quickly got dressed one handed with him in the other and rushed to the vet. The local vet treated me rudely and didn't give a damn about my situation it seemed. She told me it was going to cost up to $2500 to get him properly treated. Of course they didn't have the equipment because they're fucking dickhead dope-wads who manage fleas and vaccinations and shit.


I got a second opinion blah blah blah. Same thing as the first vet. So anyways, I ended up taking him to Kansas State Veterinary Teaching School for surgery. They put in a titanium plate and I had to leave him there for two days!

Poor Little Guy :[

Burger King Ketchup Bimbos

Ok so last night the boyfriend and I decided to go to Burger King since there were currently no groceries in the house. Plus, we were getting tired of eating at the same old restaurants every day. Of course, to get even a small sign of civilization you need to drive at least half an hour away.

30 Minutes later we arrive at Burger King and are greeted by the usual slumpy college worker trying to earn a buck. He takes our order and we go sit down to wait for our number to be called. Ten minutes later we hear, "hey did you ..uh....ever make those two double stackers?" "No."

After waiting another fuckin 10 minutes (yes I'm grouchy because this is FAST FOOD) we finally get our burgers. Everyone knows that burgers and fries require ketchup. I walk up to the dispenser and, not surprised, find it very empty.

So, I yelled to Mr. No Life college boy, "you guys are out of ketchup!" What does he do!?! He tosses 3 packets at me and informs me that this is all they have left. Pfft. Whatever. Like you seriously only have THREE packets of ketchup. I promise you there is an entire box of ketchup in your storage room and you are just way to lazy and pimple faced to care about my needs.I decided to keep my cool and enjoy my "dinner".

Just as I sit down, 2 teenage blonde bimbos come walking in. Not even cute might I add. They order food. Get it twice as fast and then guess what? Ask for ketchup...and they get it. SAY WHAT!? Fuck Burger King and their lazy college workers. WTF!? They get a whole fuckin dispenser and I got THREE packets!? Fuckin blonde ass ketchup nabbin bimbos...

P.S the best part of this whole story is that during the whole ordeal there is table of 5 guys palying pokemon in the back of the restaurant. Neat champs.

A Quest For New Internet Entertainment

http://www.barcodeart.com/art/yourself/yourself.html
What would your barcode look like? *raises eyebrow*

http://www.beardest.com/
Haha. Funny beards :P

http://www.donothingfor2minutes.com/
Never realized how hard this was to do...nothing..for TWO minutes! Craazzzy

http://www.clickclickclick.com
Only 275,959 clicks until the US takes first place for more clicks! C'mon guys...Hungary can't win :O

http://kimjongillookingatthings.tumblr.com/
Kim Jong Il looking at things. Just as it says.

http://doctorcatmd.com
Oh! More cats!

http://meowmania.jqln.org/
Since we all love cats so much :D

http://www.omglasergunspewpewpew.com/
Completely fascinate by this squirrel... and his lazer gun! PEW PEW PEW! o.O

http://www.annoyingcursor.com/
Yeah. It's really annoying.

http://mb.mailbomb.com/personalspider/
For all you people who love spiders :F

Some Picture Fun

Imagine you're relaxing in your living room after a hard days work. You kick off your shoes and head straight to the lazy boy. It's T.V time and you're in heaven! The kids, wife, and grandma all appear from the kitchen finally to have a good 'ol quality family time. You grab a beer and flip through the channels looking for you Wheel of Fortune. What you find is not what you expect at all! Suddenly, Spicy Hot Mexi Booty 4 is the title of your Wheel of Fortune! WTF!?

This little segement of photos was taken from phone at my parent's house. Apparently, their satellite receiver is going bad and confusing half of their T.V channels as porn. Listed below are some examples.

 "Island Women Wet and Nasty" on NBATV

 This is clearly the 50 First Dates and not "Chicks Gone Wild"

Stupid Videos of Kittens

This is one of my most favorite videos. It's called "Fainting Goat Kittens." The kittens have a disease that, when startled, will go stiff and fall over. Hillarious!

Kittens VS The Roomba. Many will try but who will remain at the end of this video? Watch and find out.

Now this is just mean....but awesome none the less! :D